Friar Consultation Corner: April/May 2023

This month’s questions were answered by
Citlalli Alaniz ‘24.

Anonymous question submissions can be sent to:
[email protected]

Q: Dear Friar Consultation Corner — I love to paint and participate in the BFG plays. It’s something I would love to do in the future and major  in college. My parents on the other hand are pressuring me to study something more “practical” like medicine or engineering. They don’t believe that the arts are a real future or that it will give me good income. What should I do?
—Disillusioned Artist

A: Dear Disillusioned Artist — Unfortunately the struggle between following your dreams and satisfying your parents’ expectations is pretty common. It can be tough to strike a balance between the two, but here’s the thing: ultimately you’re the one who has to live with the choices you make. Remember, you are the one who’s going to be working whichever job you decide, not your parents. If you’re truly passionate about pursuing a creative field, you owe it to yourself to give it a shot. That being said, it’s important to be realistic about the challenges you’ll face. Creative careers can be competitive and unpredictable, and it may take time and hard work to establish yourself. If you’re up for the challenge, though, don’t let your parents’ doubts hold you back. Talk to them about your goals and why they’re important to you, and try to find common ground. Maybe there are ways you can incorporate your interests into a more “practical” field, or maybe your parents just need some time to adjust to the idea. In the end, though, it’s up to you to decide what’s best for your future! — FCC


Q: Dear Friar Consultation Corner — I’m a senior who recently got accepted into college. I’m feeling a little scared about leaving my friends who I’m super close with. We are all going to different colleges and are going to be far away. I’m worried about our friendship and the transition into college. Do you have any advice for coping with this transition? I don’t want to lose my friends.
— Sad Senior

A: Dear Sad Senior — It’s completely normal to feel sad about leaving your friends and moving on to a new chapter in your life. But remember, this is also an exciting time full of new opportunities and experiences. One thing you can do is to stay connected with your friends. Make plans to visit each other, and stay in touch through social media and texting. Definitely coordinate to hang out during Thanksgiving and Christmas Break. Staying friends isn’t impossible, but it’s going to take patience. You can also make new friends in college by joining clubs and organizations that interest you. Another thing to keep in mind is that everyone is going through the same transition. You’re not alone in feeling sad or uncertain about the future. So don’t be afraid to reach out to your classmates and talk about your feelings. Finally, remember that college is a time for growth and exploration. You’ll have the opportunity to learn new things, meet new people, and discover new passions. So embrace the change and be open to all of the possibilities that lie ahead. Make use of your last summer and all the time you can with your friends before college. And don’t remember, once a Friar, always a Friar! — FCC

Q: Dear Friar Consultation Corner — My family and so many other people are always asking me what I want to do in the future. I have absolutely no idea what I want to do in my life. Should I be worried? What should I do? — Undecided Major

A: Dear Undecided Major — I feel like we’ve heard that a million times throughout our lives: what do you want to be when you grow up? It’s okay if you don’t have all the answers right now. Most people don’t! Try not to put too much pressure on yourself to have it all figured out, you still have some time so don’t stress! Instead, focus on exploring your interests and passions. Take classes or workshops in subjects that interest you, volunteer for organizations that align with your values, or even try job shadowing to get a sense of different career paths. Really try to figure out what you like and don’t like. And don’t forget to talk to people, network with them early on! Honestly, also try talking to some seniors or adults. Ask them how they figured out what they wanted to do for the rest of their lives. Reach out to family members, teachers, or guidance counselors for advice and insights. It’s okay to be uncertain about your future, but the more you explore and learn, the closer you’ll get to finding your path. It’s never too late to or too soon to find your true calling. — FCC

Q: Dear Friar Consultation Corner — I have been completely exhausted this month, no matter how much or how little sleep I get, I am always tired. It’s starting to affect my performance in sports and school! I feel like a smartphone with a battery that is constantly dying. What can I do to feel less tired all the time? Help!
— Exhausted

A: Dear Exhausted — If the issue doesn’t seem to be the quantity of sleep, I think the issue is likely the quality of sleep. Are you staring at electronics for hours before bed? Are you going to bed with your bed unmade? Are you making sure to find comfortable attire, and a comfortable temperature? There are many other factors relating to sleep issues, but it’s likely the sleep you are getting is poor or low quality, causing this exhaustion. — FCC